five am

i thought i was done
with this, but this
vicious cycle will
never end and I
hardly see an end
in sight.
these days
were supposed
to be over
but they will
never end
and i will be
taken advantage
of no matter how
much i say
no

-thurs: got wasted and puked up my guts
-fri: beginning of my weekend off, worked all day
-sat: day two of weekend off, worked all day
-sun: day three of weekend off, going in at 5am
-the gods are punishing me for thurs.

fuck
people
im not really afraid
to say it...
...i hate my life right now
and every weekend.
there is nothing
for me here
i just want to
run away and
return when i
don't need to.

stones and honey
like dead sweetness
amid foggy mist
in freezing cold
grass fields
where will the
day bring and
when will this change
5am
how could i ever know...