Wednesday, February 18, 2009

You (and YOU)

A few gone years
wondering why i
still felt and looked
like a kid and wishing
I wasn't
but then in our
Fourth time
around
you died
and thats where
i learned that life
was grey and confusing
and i became an adult

The next year we became
closer and you cast me
in a brilliant show and
your genius inside was
exposed and then the
inspiration flowed
and I acted and learned
and lived and learned
where to begin
to examine life
and went beyond
my years and knew things
young men my age never
thought about and i was
an adult with you

The next year
i saw YOU across
a crowded room
and melted into
the next stage of
intimacy and found
companionship
and went to the city
and saw those lights
in that little restaurant
reflecting off OUR glasses
of wine or in my first time
with sushi or my first
absolute and timeless
love affair with YOU and
was taught to write and
keep writing and that
these moments are
what the arts are
made of and what
WE see of each other
is truth beauty freedom
and love and lived
in the adult world
or some fabrication
of it.
YOU said hello
and shared your
thoughts and I've
lost my words
and don't
remember how
to respond or
try friendship
and i want to
to answer
YOUR mess
or confusion
but my mess is
a confusion, that
my silence is more
explained in these
meters of writing
YOU've taught me
to create. where
do i begin, my faults
and lack of communication
is my failed attempt to
for find the order of the
six words i can only
write

I'm sorry but I love you.

But this year
a mere sign of
you finding me
after the years
of trapped thoughts
and now we
lay
prickly
and thin
like kids
in a field of
thankfulness
of the safety of
the universe.

"Beyond the ridge to the west,
the sun had left the sky
Between the trees and pond
you put your hand in mine
Said, “Time has bridled us both
but I remember you, too” i & w

Thursday, February 12, 2009

SJR

Chech out my other blog...
southjerseyrialto.blogspot.com

bop it!

just trying some new blogging software out. Blogpress which I had to pay wayy more for than iBlogger. But it seems like this blogpress can only do about half the things iBlogger can do. Oh well. Show tonight.

-- Posted with Blog Press

Thursday, February 5, 2009

The Tale of the Sad Hopeless Young Boy.

I've outstayed my
welcome with them
nothing is right
anymore. such a
pointed flaw early
on. should be done
by now. i can't
stand it, i need
to disappear.
we need to
disappear from
this mayhem,
because the
experienced
do exactly as
they're told
and not
guess...

but out from
the dark stage
out from burning
embarrassing footlights
an unexpected visitor,
and never a stranger
i see the face for a
second and cover my
eyes to fight back
with every morsel
of my anatomy
the bursts of
oceanic tears
i've been
holding
inside for the
longest time.
I don't know
what is happening
to me. whats going
on in my life.
I feel so confused.

But now i open
my eyes and
see the face
of the unexpected
visitor and for
some unexplained
reason, for some
rooted grounding
this sad hopeless
young boy standing
in front of you
staring in disbelief
needs you
more than
ever and kisses
you back with
now no feeling
of utter
despair.
only utter
life with
his head
over top
of his heels
wipes himself
off
and
tries
again.

"Look around and you will see
There's always me." -Elvis.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

chordal apology

A day drained
at the upright
away by that
cold sick place
No show on
the pastor so
it's a sing-a-long
with me leading
on the upright
wondering if i'll
ever get out
extending there
and in ever aspect
of my life

A day made
better
at the grand
sitting playing
a few notes
and i approach
sit on the edge
of the bench
and play those
two little chords
bringing me back
to warmer days
of red cowboy boots
and stale cigarettres
no one listened.
except the person
next to me.

"god, that sounds so
familiar like its from
a movie"

"its a song we
used to listen to..."

"i dont remember it"

neither do i

"Don't walk too close,
don't breathe so soft
Don't talk so sweet,
don't sing" - Don't