deadlines

i can barely breath
from up here
so high my
eyeballs want to
pop out of my
suffocating brain
at the top of the
library among
thousands of books,
streaming over papers
and deadlines and the
sheer fright that
it'll never get done,
the assurance that they
always do, the plan of
how to do all of this
in such a short amount of
time.
So many before
and so many among me
yet i need some way
to follow
and generate the
craft being handed down.
generate a new craft
and make the many
principles and practices
become my own
unique way
something standing
robust, functioning,
and beautiful.
Is there time?
was this wasted?

I need to build
something
with words.
Starting at
the bottom
where
is the
top?

"Do you mean to tell me that you're thinking seriously of building that way, when and if you are an architect?"
"Yes."
"My dear fellow, who will let you?"
"That's not the point. The point is, who will stop me?"
- The Fountainhead